Monday, December 3, 2007

Desperation in the Land of Mediocrity


Well It's that time of year again, a time when children become more annoying, adults drink far to much, and your local mall shoves "Jingle Bell Rock" into your ear like a rectal thermometer. The only thing that can cheer me up this holiday season is the fact that Carson Daly is more desperate than I am. This writer's strike has hit Carson Daly, that lovable late night host that nobody loves, especially hard because he is now asking people to call a joke hot line number at (818) 260-5107 and give suggestions for him to perform on his show. He claims that he will "play some, most, or all of your jokes on the air." I don't really see how this will affect the shows quality in any way. In fact it might be funnier off the air than on. Just think in the near future you could say to one of your friends "Hey remember Carson's old talk show?" And then your friend would reply coolly, "Oh yeah, I remember, it was like a Holocaust of the senses."

His show will always be remembered as a cavalcade of mediocrity and poor writing. I still wonder though, Will Carson ever be hailed as the almighty VJ that he once was? Will he be returned to his former glory and sit on his throne of Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears compact discs? I sincerely hope so. I do have some constructive criticism for that lovable loser, if he made his show just musical guests and left the comedy to someone talented like Conan or Dave than his show wouldn't need writers and it would actually be interesting and different, what a concept huh? Now, after taking a verbal baseball bat to Carson's over sized melon-like head I feel much better about myself and how I will hopefully surpass Carson and his "celebrity" status in the near future. Now if you'll excuse me I am going to go cry in the corner.

--Ben--

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